I wanna be Bob Dylan
Mr. Jones wishes he was someone just a little more funky
When everybody love you
Oh! Son, that’s just about as funky as you can be!
The magic wand is out today and it’s going to grant you your biggest baseball wish. Well, you know, within reason. Aw, shoot, let me just tell you what your choices are.
1. Pete Alonso – yes, you get to be the young star with the world at his feet. Nothing but opportunity lies ahead. But you’re also not a made man yet. It could all blow up in your face.
2. Yoenis Cespedes – You have an extensive collection of terrific cars, a ranch you’re passionate about and more than enough money to live the life you want. But you’re on the downside of your baseball career and are coming off very serious injuries. The public doubts your ability to come back and while people respect what you’ve done, the word “beloved” has never been mentioned in conjunction with your name. But a healthy season in 2020 where you drive the team to the championship could give you that one missing thing.
3. Luis Rojas – After years of being a company man, the big boss puts you in charge of the signature product line. You may not be in your 20s anymore but you’re one of the youngest guys currently to have the prestigious position that you do. You do well, you’re a made man and can write your ticket. You stumble, you still can be a company man somewhere else and still get a shot – perhaps older and wiser – at the top with a competitor.
4. Brodie Van Wagenen – You’re a millionaire with Ken-doll looks and you’re in complete control of your destiny. Your team has a reasonable shot at the playoffs and if/when you make the postseason you have the front-line pitching to match up with anyone. You win and bring a championship to the Mets for the first time in 30+ years, you’re considered royalty. If you don’t win, it’s a shrug of the shoulders from the rest of the world. Tremendous upside, very little downside – other than having to play golf with the younger Wilpon.
5. Jeff Wilpon – You’re the COO of the Mets and you’re the one they’re going to hand the World Series trophy to on live television. You’re also a VP or some such similar title in your dad’s other business ventures and you’ve got a cushy job in all of them. You’re wealthy by almost any definition of the word and if your dad sells the Mets and you invest wisely, you could end up being a billionaire. You’re also generally disliked by everyone and considered to be incompetent by the masses. But you wipe your tears with $1,000 bills.
Which Mets-related guy do you want to be?
- Pete Alonso (38%, 8 Votes)
- Luis Rojas (19%, 4 Votes)
- Jeff Wilpon (19%, 4 Votes)
- Brodie Van Wagenen (14%, 3 Votes)
- Yoenis Cespedes (10%, 2 Votes)
Total Voters: 21